If you are looking for romance, using Kaizen to build a relationship is a novel and effective approach to try. Read on to learn more.
What’s Your Starting Point?
Do you have a friendship that you wish would progress to a romantic relationship? You know, the dreaded “friend zone?” If you’re stuck there and wanting to get out, you may wonder how best to do that. The principles of Kaizen can help.
Or maybe you currently have no romantic relationship and no prospects. This can make your relationship goal very daunting, to say the least. How do you start? How do you make yourself known to someone who doesn’t yet know you? And how do you get them to think of you romantically once you’ve met?
You could just walk up to a stranger and ask them out. It works on TV shows. 🙂 But it’s not necessarily the best way to set the odds up in your favor, and it could potentially be very awkward if that person is someone that you work with or that you otherwise see regularly.
Enter the Kaizen strategy. This basically means building or improving your situation gradually rather than trying to suddenly make one large change.
Let’s see how this might apply to the situations mentioned above.
How to Use Kaizen to Build a Romantic Relationship
If you’re in the “friend zone” and wishing it would progress to something more, Kaizen is a great way to avoid outright rejection and a damaged friendship. It’s very romantic and natural when done correctly, and it can also help you to avoid and overcome nerves. So how does it work? Here are a few Kaizen-type things you could try.
Arrange an activity for just the two of you vs a group. Repeat this a few times. If they seem amenable to it, that could be a good sign–vs if they suggest including others.
Offer a compliment about their appearance or something that might typically be considered flirtatious. Observe their response.
You should be able to tell at this point if your friend shares your interest in moving out of the friend zone. If they don’t, your friendship is still intact. If they do, then, yay!
If you don’t know someone at all, then the first ‘small step’ you can take to building a relationship is–obviously- to get to know them. This might mean that you simply ask for an introduction. So if there is someone that you both know then you should ask for them to give you an introduction.
Alternatively, it might just mean that you try to work with them or that you otherwise orchestrate an opportunity to speak to them on a regular basis. You might just have to find a situation where you can say hello and introduce yourself.
Now it’s time to progress the relationship. Each circumstance can be different, but, in the case of someone you see at work, you might try to gradually increase the amount of time you spend with them. Swap shifts or assignments to accomplish this. Hang out in areas you know they visit–like the break room at work (just don’t do it so much you get fired ;)).
From there you can try seeing them in a social setting – maybe a groups of people from work are going out after work. Join them.
Once you’ve firmly established yourself in their minds as someone they know, it’s then socially acceptable to attempt to open a one to one communication. Suggest something neutral like taking a walk break at work, or walking them to their car.
Do this regularly and then you proceed as you did from the “friend zone.”
The beauty of this slow and steady approach is that is helps avoid awkwardness if the romantic interest is not mutual. At the same time, it’s also a great way to get to know someone before getting romantically involved–saves potential heartache.
Kaizen has so many applications! Learn more and start applying the principles today!